Living with Dementia: Enjoying the Present Moment
September 3, 2010 by Holly
I just came back from a run with my husband, Dave. It is an absolutely gorgeous fall morning–sun is shining, with wispy clouds and a feel of coolness in the air. Perfect for running. As we are heading towards the sun, I look up to see many layers and shapes of clouds, on a backdrop of the deep blue sky. What is interesting, and particularly beautiful, are the colours around the sun–shades of mint green and fuchsia-almost like a rainbow but without the rain. I mention it to Dave, who isn’t...
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Magic Moments
August 28, 2010 by Holly
Living as a carer for my husband, Dave with dementia (frontotemporal dementia) is a challenging and life changing experience. There have been times (too numerous to count) when I have wanted to hand the job over to someone else. This isn’t what I had planned for the years when our kids left home and we were still young enough to travel, hike and bike wherever. But this is what life is handing us and I finally figured out that I can’t fight it and I had better learn to accept it. This...
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Finding Humour in Dementia
August 22, 2010 by Holly
Living with dementia (my husband, Dave, has frontotemporal dementia) can be challenging, but at the same time a great teacher. The other day Dave and I are sitting under a giant ponderosa pine tree, enjoying the sights and sounds of the birds around our pond. Since Dave’s dementia affects his language skills, he doesn’t talk very much and when he does, he likes to start a conversation with a question; then more questions. This time he is asking me about our springer spaniels…
...
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Living with Dementia: Organized Chaos
August 14, 2010 by Holly
Organized chaos…it must look like my life is busy from the outside with balancing work, home, family, caring for my husband, Dave, with frontotemporal dementia, and fitting in ‘me’ time, but I found a secret for staying calm–most of the time. It is called exercise. Sometimes it is a bike ride, a run, Nordic hike, kayak or gardening. Whatever it is–without exception–I feel better afterwards. This morning was a good example… [Read The Full Article] Read More →
News-fasting is Healthy
The other morning my mother-in-law phoned me at 6 am (she knows I like to get up at 4 am and read, meditate or write) to ask me how the wildfire was. What fire? She said…”the one in your part of town”. We live in the country among sage brush, miniature cacti and pine beetle (dead) trees so summer fires aren’t uncommon.
Anyway, I looked outside and saw a bit of smoke but knew we weren’t in immediate risk of evacuation. We chatted some more, I thanked her and then checked...
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Changing my thoughts & beliefs about Caregiving
June 28, 2010 by Holly
In Kody Bateman’s book ‘Promptings–your Inner Guide to Making a Difference’ he tells us a story about his black lab Gus, who loves to retrieve balls but doesn’t like to give it up. The only way he can coax Gus to give up his dirty, slobbery ball is to throw several new ones. He said the grimy balls are like our limiting beliefs that we hang on to for years. According to the teachings of Abraham, a belief is only a thought we keep thinking–or saying over and over...
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Living with Dementia is made Easier with Systems
June 10, 2010 by Holly
Order, systems, routines–they are my saving grace as a caregiver for my husband, Dave who has Frontotemporal dementia (dx 3 1/2 years ago). I used to chuckle at Dave’s set routines–news at 7:40 & 8:00 am, cutting the lawn on Mondays, gym on Tuesdays & Thursdays, and now he has 2 types of jam for his toast that he alternates days. He may not remember to let the dogs out to pee but he doesn’t forget which jam he ate yesterday.
Last year I hit a major turning point in...
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‘Letting Go’ of Fear Eases Caregiving
May 28, 2010 by Holly
When my husband, Dave was diagnosed with Frontotemporal dementia (FTD) 3 1/2 years ago, I was terrified. I didn’t know how we were going to manage with a disease more dreaded than cancer. With cancer, there is hope of a cure or remission. With dementia there isn’t any.Bestselling author Byron Katie says…” there is no greater illusion than fear. It’s caused by believing what you think. It’s always a story of a future, projected from our past.”
Living with...
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Changing Perspective is Key to Easier Living with Dementia
Life over the past 3 ½ years has been a time of massive personal growth. I never imagined that my husband, Dave, would be diagnosed with a form of dementia (Frontotemporal) at the young age of 57. I also never imagined that my life would be richer because of this diagnosis.
There is no denying there are difficult times, or that there are moments when I don’t think I can handle one more change, one more responsibility. But I am finding it easier to move through those periods simply by changing...
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Dementia Caregiver’s Choice
I like routines-predictable and comfortable. Since my husband, Dave, was diagnosed with Frontotemporal dementia 3 ½ years ago, my life has been anything but routine. The brain is our most complex organ, making it difficult for scientists to predict the exact progression of brain diseases, like Alzheimer’s & related dementias.
It took 2 years to realize that dementia is out of my control. The only thing I can control is how I am living with it. I have a choice. I can continue being sad...
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