Everyone Needs a Little Lovin’

  It is 4:45 a.m., my absolute favorite time of the day. I am sitting with my tea, a book and a little ‘ginger boy’ named Clive snuggling (and purring) on my chest. Two months ago this skinny 5-month old kitten showed up on our daughter, Amy’s doorstep looking for affection.  She said he was more interested in staying in her arms than eating food. As it has turned out, we adopted him from Amy. We thought Clive needed a buddy so we rescued another little guy, Henry from a shelter.... 

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The ‘D’ Word

Everywhere in the news there are stories about the rising incident of the dreaded “D” disease. It seems there is more mass panic over developing Alzheimer’s or some other form of dementia than developing cancer. When someone is diagnosed with cancer, the doctor will usually have a plan for the patient. There is treatment, hope for remission, and guidelines on what to do. But being diagnosed with dementia is different. When we left the doctor’s office 5 years ago after my husband,... 

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The Dance

There is a beautiful song written by Garth Brooks titled the Dance. The first time I read part of the lyrics was in an obituary in 1988. A young friend of my son was in a tragic horse accident and her father wrote…”how could I have known you’d ever say goodbye. And now I’m glad I didn’t know the way it all would end the way it all would go. Our lives are better left to chance. I could have missed the pain But I’d of had to miss the dance Holding you”. Every time I experience pain or... 

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If You Have a Lemon, Make a Lemonade

Sometimes when I read a personal growth book I like to open it at a random page to see my ‘message of the day’. Last night I started reading Dale Carnegie’s book—‘How to Stop Worrying and Start Living’ and the chapter was titled…’if you have a lemon, make a lemonade’. It is a story about a woman, Thelma, who moves with her husband to a military training center in the middle of the Mojave Desert, California. She lives in a one-room shack in the unbearable heat–125 degrees in... 

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Dealing With Sadness in Caregiving

Once a month I’m a guest on Denise Brown’s radio show on caregiving.com. She comes up with interesting topics and this month it was Sadness in Caregiving. Before the show airs, I like to do some prep work but I was having difficulty with this one. Why? Because by default, I run away from the feeling of sadness. I grew up in a family where we were reprimanded for crying. I didn’t want people to think that I was weak and couldn’t  handle what life was giving me. I was also... 

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Ticket to Freedom In The World of Dementia

When my husband, Dave, was initially diagnosed with Frontotemporal dementia 4 years ago, I wondered if I would ever feel free again. Last December Dave must have wondered the same thing when he handed in his driver’s license. His truck, and the privilege of driving, was his ticket to freedom. Or so I thought. [Read The Full Article]  Read More →

Early Christmas Birthday Present

I love this time of year. The hustle, the bustle but mainly spending time with our family playing board games, snowshoeing, snacking on cheese ball & crackers and sipping wine by candlelight. This is also the time of year when I take off my ‘business’ clothes and pull out my fun-wear. So starting this afternoon, I am putting away my pen & paper and my daughter, Amy and I are making sugar cookies and nuts & bolts. But before starting my holidays I want to share the best Christmas &... 

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Pollyanna?

Last week I had an interesting interview with a National magazine reporter, Janet, about caregiving. She wanted to find a baby boomer caregiver who loves what they do. After answering questions on how my life (and our family) has changed and what’s so good about it, she made a comment that I have wondered a few times myself. She said she has heard these type of comments before and wondered whether people will think I am being a Pollyanna. I told her that I have questioned myself when friends ask... 

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Waking up to my Reality Makes it Easier to Live with Dementia

The loneliest years of my life were the first 18 months after my husband, Dave was diagnosed with Frontotemporal dementia. We were both in our 50s and dementia isn’t supposed to happen to couples our age. I didn’t know how to deal with it, where to go, or what to do. Many of my friends reassured me that I was strong enough to handle it. When I found myself crying in my office or out on a walk, I beat myself up because I’m supposed to be strong. You see-I grew up being told that crying is for... 

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Words of wisdom from a 20-something about her Dad with Dementia

This week I was finishing up my 5-week teleseminar series, Dementia Hope Formula, and for a special treat I had my daughter, Amy, speak honestly about how her life is changing with her Dad having dementia (frontotemporal) Amy : what has affected you the most about having a Dad who is different than the one you grew up with? I realize all of the great memories growing up–the teaching about the wilderness, and the patience he had. I am grateful for all that my Dad has given me in the past. I... 

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