Slowing Down and Really Smelling the Roses

This morning I sat at my computer and was browsing through my journal when I came across a note (and reminder) I had written on July 21, 2011… I went for a run along our country road and it was full of surprises. There is an abundance of wildlife in our area but it seemed more acute today. The list of birds is like opening the Audobon bird book. I saw a pair of western tanagers chasing each other, a group of cedar waxwings eating dogwood berries, juncos on the side of the road, yellow warblers... 

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Food for Thought–SELF-LOVE

There is a saying…’you teach what you need to learn’. This is what I’m doing by writing and sharing what I’m learning about self-love. These past few years have been a time of massive personal growth and uncovering the ‘real’ Holly. It isn’t an easy process but definitely worth the sweat and tears that come along with it. Living with a husband with dementia has taught me about unconditional love, patience, surrendering to what is, and living in the present moment. In addition,... 

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Ticket to Freedom In The World of Dementia

When my husband, Dave, was initially diagnosed with Frontotemporal dementia 4 years ago, I wondered if I would ever feel free again. Last December Dave must have wondered the same thing when he handed in his driver’s license. His truck, and the privilege of driving, was his ticket to freedom. Or so I thought. [Read The Full Article]  Read More →

Laughter is the Best Medicine

There is nothing better than laughing until you cry. The studies have proven that it releases endorphins that are 50 times more potent than morphine. We produce our own anti-depressant with NO side effects. How great is that? When was the last time you laughed until you cried? Can you remember how good you felt afterwards? I was chatting with my friend, Sue, on the phone and she was complaining about her house being a mess, her business not doing as well as she expected, and that her life felt like... 

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Living with Dementia: Enjoying the Present Moment

I just came back from a run with my husband, Dave. It is an absolutely gorgeous fall morning–sun is shining, with wispy clouds and a feel of coolness in the air. Perfect for running. As we are heading towards the sun, I look up to see many layers and shapes of clouds, on a backdrop of the deep blue sky. What is interesting, and particularly beautiful, are the colours around the sun–shades of mint green and fuchsia-almost like a rainbow but without the rain. I mention it to Dave, who isn’t... 

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Magic Moments

Living as a carer for my husband, Dave with dementia (frontotemporal dementia) is a challenging and life changing experience. There have been times (too numerous to count) when I have wanted to hand the job over to someone else. This isn’t what I had planned for the years when our kids left home and we were still young enough to travel, hike and bike wherever. But this is what life is handing us and I finally figured out that I can’t fight it and I had better learn to accept it. This... 

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Living with Dementia: Organized Chaos

Organized chaos…it must look like my life is busy from the outside with balancing work, home, family, caring for my husband, Dave, with frontotemporal dementia, and fitting in ‘me’ time, but I found a secret for staying calm–most of the time. It is called exercise. Sometimes it is a bike ride, a run, Nordic hike, kayak or gardening. Whatever it is–without exception–I feel better afterwards. This morning was a good example… [Read The Full Article]  Read More →

News-fasting is Healthy

The other morning my mother-in-law phoned me at 6 am (she knows I like to get up at 4 am and read, meditate or write) to ask me how the wildfire was. What fire? She said…”the one in your part of town”. We live in the country among sage brush, miniature cacti and pine beetle (dead) trees so summer fires aren’t uncommon. Anyway, I looked outside and saw a bit of smoke but knew we weren’t in immediate risk of evacuation. We chatted some more, I thanked her and then checked... 

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Working through moments of sadness

This morning Dave had just left with the dogs for a walk and I was getting ready for a run. I was sitting in the den when I noticed how tired I was feeling. It was emotional fatigue from a week of household challenges—the furnace breaking down, the central vacuum not working and a whole electrical circuit out. Since my husband, Dave, was diagnosed with Frontotemporal dementia 3 years ago, I have gradually taken over his chores; chores that came easily to his ‘male’ brain. I had no idea how... 

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Walking in my shoes–living with a spouse with frontotemporal dementia

Every time  my sister or children come to visit, I learn a little bit more about how I am managing my new life—a life with my husband, Dave who has Frontotemporal dementia. I am more aware of how I speak to him–including my tone and patience. I am also more aware of how I ‘respond’ or ‘react’ to comments from people who step into our lives for a few hours or a few days; people who have good intentions, but aren’t walking in my shoes. A good example was the other night… Dave was... 

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