Living with Dementia: Enjoying the Present Moment

I just came back from a run with my husband, Dave. It is an absolutely gorgeous fall morning–sun is shining, with wispy clouds and a feel of coolness in the air. Perfect for running. As we are heading towards the sun, I look up to see many layers and shapes of clouds, on a backdrop of the deep blue sky. What is interesting, and particularly beautiful, are the colours around the sun–shades of mint green and fuchsia-almost like a rainbow but without the rain. I mention it to Dave, who isn’t... 

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Magic Moments

Living as a carer for my husband, Dave with dementia (frontotemporal dementia) is a challenging and life changing experience. There have been times (too numerous to count) when I have wanted to hand the job over to someone else. This isn’t what I had planned for the years when our kids left home and we were still young enough to travel, hike and bike wherever. But this is what life is handing us and I finally figured out that I can’t fight it and I had better learn to accept it. This... 

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Living with Dementia: Organized Chaos

Organized chaos…it must look like my life is busy from the outside with balancing work, home, family, caring for my husband, Dave, with frontotemporal dementia, and fitting in ‘me’ time, but I found a secret for staying calm–most of the time. It is called exercise. Sometimes it is a bike ride, a run, Nordic hike, kayak or gardening. Whatever it is–without exception–I feel better afterwards. This morning was a good example… [Read The Full Article]  Read More →

Changing my thoughts & beliefs about Caregiving

In Kody Bateman’s book ‘Promptings–your Inner Guide to Making a Difference’ he tells us a story about his black lab Gus, who loves to retrieve balls but doesn’t like to give it up. The only way he can coax Gus to give up his dirty, slobbery ball is to throw several new ones. He said the grimy balls are like our limiting beliefs that we hang on to for years. According to the teachings of Abraham, a belief is only a thought we keep thinking–or saying over and over... 

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Living with Dementia is made Easier with Systems

Order, systems, routines–they are my saving grace as a caregiver for my husband, Dave who has Frontotemporal dementia (dx 3 1/2 years ago). I used to chuckle at Dave’s set routines–news at 7:40 & 8:00 am, cutting the lawn on Mondays, gym on Tuesdays & Thursdays, and now he has 2 types of jam for his toast that he alternates days. He may not remember to let the dogs out to pee but he doesn’t forget which jam he ate yesterday. Last year I hit a major turning point in... 

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Changing Perspective is Key to Easier Living with Dementia

Life over the past 3 ½ years has been a time of massive personal growth. I never imagined that my husband, Dave, would be diagnosed with a form of dementia (Frontotemporal) at the young age of 57. I also never imagined that my life would be richer because of this diagnosis. There is no denying there are difficult times, or that there are moments when I don’t think I can handle one more change, one more responsibility. But I am finding it easier to move through those periods simply by changing... 

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Dementia Caregiver’s Choice

I like routines-predictable and comfortable. Since my husband, Dave, was diagnosed with Frontotemporal dementia 3 ½ years ago, my life has been anything but routine. The brain is our most complex organ, making it difficult for scientists to predict the exact progression of brain diseases, like Alzheimer’s & related dementias. It took 2 years to realize that dementia is out of my control. The only thing I can control is how I am living with it. I have a choice. I can continue being sad... 

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Working through moments of sadness

This morning Dave had just left with the dogs for a walk and I was getting ready for a run. I was sitting in the den when I noticed how tired I was feeling. It was emotional fatigue from a week of household challenges—the furnace breaking down, the central vacuum not working and a whole electrical circuit out. Since my husband, Dave, was diagnosed with Frontotemporal dementia 3 years ago, I have gradually taken over his chores; chores that came easily to his ‘male’ brain. I had no idea how... 

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Another Glimpse into our Life with Dementia

I was watching Jerry & Esther Hicks’ DVD, Let Loose, and something they said hit home…”when you engage in what is fun within you, life is funner”.  It is amazing how children do this naturally. For the past 2 days I haven’t been feeling well—the common cold. When I am not well, I tend to look at life from the bottom half of the glass. Despite my husband having frontotemporal dementia, I appreciate  lessons about patience, flexibility and surrendering to what life is giving me, but... 

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What about the Children of Families with Dementia?

When I started writing my blogs and articles a few months ago, I did it because I couldn’t ignore my inner voice. A voice telling me to share what I am learning as I journey along this road with my husband and his dementia. I am surprised at the impact writing has had on my life. Besides releasing deeply buried emotions, it is giving me clarity about the road ahead. It is giving me a purpose to this time in my life. But one of my greatest joys and surprises has been connecting with the children... 

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